Hi television neighbor, I’m glad we’re together again…

I grew up during the end of the 80’s and through the 90’s. Having a sister with a disability and a new baby brother was challenging enough for a four year old, and especially when my mother spent a lot of that time in and out of the hospital and in a bad marriage. I spent my days requesting songs from Beetlejuice and playing house in pre-school before coming home to read and watch my favorite shows on TV. I watched a lot of PBS because my mom liked to make sure my developing brain was watching something somewhat wholesome while she could control it. (I watched a lot of Nickelodeon, Daria and Beavis & Butthead when she was not around. Sorry, mom…)

One sound that will forever be lodged in my head was the sound of the train blasting on my TV before the announcement that you would hear “a word from our generous sponsors” and then leading to the soothing sound of Fred Rogers’ voice and the Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood theme song.

I spent years watching Mr. Rogers and his words would always get me through dark times. He taught me to love everyone, to take care of myself and a healthy way to express all my emotions. When you are four you go through a lot and you can’t always figure out how to express everything that goes on in your head. But the thing I learned and always stayed with me was this quote:

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”
― Fred Rogers

My brother was born on June 3, only 16 days before I would turn four. My sister died exactly a week after my birthday. I was about to start pre-school like every normal kid my age. But nothing about that time was normal. A new baby brother, a sister that had just died, a really mean step-dad that abused my mom in front of me and a lot of shuffling around to different family member’s houses as my mom had a breakdown. I worried about who would be around to take care of my dog Alex if I was not home or who would feed my fish. I started having night terrors because the room I once shared with my baby sister was empty. Was God going to take me away too? What about my new brother? Why did he cause so much pain in my life? It was too much for my developing brain and emotions so I started seeing a therapist. I remember her scented markers as she asked me to draw out all my feelings I had that day and the waiting room that played Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood.

The scary things weren’t always in the news for me. It was happening right in front of me. My life has always been filled with what feels like more than I can ever handle. I went through some serious depression (and still live with it), I watched my mom leave an abusive marriage and then I ended up in an abusive relationship. I’ve lost people close to me and never had a real relationship with my dad. But what did I do? I looked for the helpers. I looked to my grandparents, aunts, and uncles that would take me in and make sure I had what I needed. To the uncles and my grandpa that would never let me feel excluded when there was a father/daughter dance. Everyone that helped my mom and had a role in raising me.

I looked for the helpers as I was scared in my classroom watching the news on 9/11. I looked for the helpers after every single shooting. I will always look for them. I feel comfort in knowing that while this world might be a mess, there is still good left in this world.

Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood was on the air from 1968-2001. Over 30 years’ worth of teaching children how to do good and be good. Addressing real problems going on in the world in a way that would help children not be afraid and understand. He put us first and raised us. All of us. All of his neighbors. It didn’t matter what your race or religion was. It didn’t matter if you were able-bodied or not. He loved you for who you are and wanted to make sure you knew that every episode.

I saw a tweet earlier from an IndyStar journalist with a story she shared. Mr. Rogers died on this day back in 2003. But she shared a story about someone that needed Mr. Rogers well into his adult life and had a moment with him that will live with him forever. You can read that story here. (Grab the tissues, seriously.)

I shared the story with Billy, another big fan of Mr. Rogers. He said “I feel like Mr. Rogers is almost more prominent than ever now, and that’s pretty amazing.” I agree. The universe so desperately needs him and the good people in this world that grew up with him are trying to keep his message alive. At the end of the day, we all need to be reminded of our very special neighbor and that there is still some good left in this world. And maybe a juice box and a nap, but that’s just four year-old Chrystal talking now.

Honor Mr. Rogers today and always by being a good neighbor.