Chrystal O'Keefe

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I have no fear of commitment, only containment

Posted on August 2, 2016January 3, 2019 by chrystal

What is the obsession with marriage?

Maybe I’m bitter because of how awful my marriage was. I could also be terrified of putting myself back in the position, being so vulnerable.

“When are you two getting married?”

I get asked almost daily. I’m a little concerned when people ask. We were completely private about our relationship for almost 3 months. We’ve only been together for 10 months now. Not even a year. So why are so many people asking? What happened to just being a couple for a while without any pressure for marriage? Why can’t two people just be together and be happy? I don’t need a legal document to prove my love. I need someone there every day and every night. I need someone to love me (and my kids) unconditionally. I want small gestures and forehead kisses. That’s what love is to me.
I say all of this, knowing that I have a hidden board on Pinterest devoted to the idea of marriage again. I’ll be 100% honest about that. But I will also admit that I will be fine if it never happens again. I’m with someone who I love more than the first sip of coffee in the morning. If he were to ever ask I would probably come back with “what took you so long?” But if he doesn’t, oh well. I’m not going anywhere. All that matters is that I get to be with him at the end of the day.

I have even more people telling me that marriage would help my custody case and desire to move. But I don’t see why just being a great mother won’t work. Again, with the constant push for me to get married.

“You’re almost 30, you don’t want to be a bride at 40.” Well, maybe that’s not ideal for you, but that doesn’t matter to me. Love doesn’t expire.

I just want to be with my boyfriend for as long as possible. Married or not, I don’t care. Who doesn’t want some 70 year old lady introducing her boyfriend of 40 years?

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